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An English drawing room, sometime in the mid 19th Century:

FARNSWORTH: I say, I’m going to work with that fellow in Vienna.

BELLINGHAM: Which one?

FARNSWORTH: The Viennese one.

BELLINGHAM: Oh yes, the one from Vienna.

GARGOYLESHIRE: What?

BELLINGHAM: I don’t care for him.

SHROPINDALE: I daresay.

FARNSWORTH: Why not?

BELLINGHAM: He’s a lady and child smoker.

FARNSWORTH: He smokes ladies and children?

BELLINGHAM: Worse, he smokes in front of ladies and children.

FARNSWORTH: Scandalous.

SHROPINDALE: Indubitably.

GARGOYLESHIRE: What?

FARNSWORTH: He is a bit eccentric.

BELLINGHAM: Does he have an idea?

FARNSWORTH:  He has several.

BELLINGHAM: Does one of them involve inventing a device wherein I can watch Quincy, ME?

FARNSWORTH: Yes.

SHROPINDALE: Indeed.

BELLINGHAM: Then I’ve changed my opinion of him.

FARNSWORTH: Have you then?

BELLINGHAM: Yes. I now love him to the point of distraction.

SHROPINDALE: Bad luck old man.

GARGOYLESHIRE: What?

FARNSWORTH: This conversation has made me hunger greatly. I am going to order lunch.

BELLINGHAM: From whence?

FARNSWORTH: I was thinking about The Cock and the Houligan.

SHROPINDALE: Good show.

BELLINGHAM: I’ve a coupon for half a farthing off.

FARNSWORTH: Good, give it me.

BELLINGHAM: I don’t have it.

FARNSWORTH: You don’t?

BELLINGHAM: No, it’s in my mind. I’ll send it to you telepathically.

FARNSWORTH: I shall concentrate then.

BELLINGHAM: Are you ready?

FARNSWORTH: Yes, send it at once.

BELLINGHAM: Right then. Have you got it?

FARNSWORTH: No.

BELLINGHAM: What have you?

FARNSWORTH: A nude picture of Betty White.

SHROPINDALE: Good God, man.

BELLINGHAM: You don’t have the half farthing off coupon?

FARNSWORTH: No, I’m afraid not.

BELLINGHAM: It’s rather a nice one. It has filigrees.

FARNSWORTH: So does Betty White.

BELLINGHAM: Pish posh then. We shall have to pay full price for our luncheon.

FARNSWORTH: I’m afraid so.

BELLINGHAM: Dash.

SHROPINDALE: Bother.

GARGOYLESHIRE: What?


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2 thoughts on “somnolence (part 4 of a 2 part trilogy)

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