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So I applied for unemployment today for the first time in 30-some years of working. I did start the process in California, when I lost the first of three jobs in a row in 2006-8, but I ended up getting job #2 and didn’t follow up. By the time I lost job #3 it was pretty clear that disability was the way to go.

Because I’m a stuck-up, South-hating Yankee this is where you would expect to find a hi-freaking-larious post about the backwoods town I live in and how messed up the unemployment system in my podunk state is.

Nope. Not today. I went to the One Stop Center downtown where they handle employment, job training, etc. The staff couldn’t have been more helpful and I was in and out in less than 45 minutes. Of course, if I qualify, it will take about three weeks or so before I get a check, but starting the process was relatively painless. Before I was employed at WalMart I was receiving services from the County Mental Health agency and they were also nothing but professional. Much different from LA County where the psychiatrist they gave me hated to listen, and I can’t prove it but I got the impression that my social worker still lived with his mother.

Like I should talk.

Anyway, it took me most of the morning to get up and out. I decided to put on a dress shirt and slacks. I’m not sure why, maybe I thought that at some point in the process somebody there would say, “Hey, you wanna job here?” That didn’t happen by the way.

So I did my application on one of their computers, the next thing I’ll get is a letter saying how much $ I’ll get. At some point I’ll probably have to participate in a “Fact Finding Process” wherein they will ask me why I was terminated by WalMart, I will say that in spite of my best efforts I was unable to meet the expectations WalMart had for their third shift produce stocker, they may call WalMart and ask if I deserve unemployment, they will say whatever they say (probably yes) and then I’ll either be approved or I won’t. In the meantime I am to apply for at least four jobs a week.

And so it goes.

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