or “Why the flying space monkeys did I ever even think about macking on a 27 year old???”

ליבי טלפון 668
Dear Sprinkles

Why did you delete me from MySpace?

I want nothing but to be your friend, I swear. I am so over my stupid infatuation with you, honestly. But now I feel like you’re just playing games with me. The other day when I had finally had enough and asked you about the cold shoulder I’ve been getting from you since the new year started you said that there’s nothing wrong, but you still hardly talk to me…and now this.

The only reason I requested that you add me was that Sarge said that you were his MySpace friend. Hell, I never even go on MySpace anymore. So you added me and now two days later I find that both myself AND Sarge have been deleted. It’s one thing that you’re playing this passive aggressive shit with me, but I get the same treatment as Sarge? Thanks, can I have a little more salt for that wound?

Maybe you think I’m just another creepy dude that has the hots for you, but I have been nothing but loyal to you.

Who stood by you when you thought crazy cake lady was going to come back to the bakery and make you cry?

Who has been wearing the yellow ribbon button and praying for your brother in Iraq every day?

Who offered to help you when your Mama was in the hospital last week? If you think I did all that just because I want to get in your pants then you never really knew me at all.

I admit that I made God’s own fool of myself with you and I’m sorry about that. If I could do things over I would, but believe me that part of my life is over. Not that it matters to you but I’ve started seeing somebody that I met online. If we ever talked anymore I would have told you about her. But that doesn’t stop me from missing our friendship, such as it was.

I know you won’t respond to this, and I’ll never bring it up again unless you do. If at some point you decide that you want to talk things out, my door is open to you. Aside from that I’ll be friendly and professional with you for as long as we work together and I hope that you’ll extend the same courtesy to me.


Note to my fervent readers: I may have overstated the thing about me seeing someone. I have been in contact with a woman I met on OK Cupid (she’s 40 thank God!) and let’s just say that we’re still in the e-mailing phase, but Sprinkles doesn’t need to know that.

Oh, and I may actually send a somewhat less angry version of this message to her on MySpace. Which would make the title misleading, but wasn’t that a great Moody Blues song?


10 thoughts on “Letters I’ve written, never meaning to send

  1. Joe, I think Sprinkles has played head games way to long with you! I think after the last encounter with her ignoring you. How you were kind and wrote her the note. I wish she would know what a friend you are. I think her age has so much to say. I’m Sorry Joe.


  2. Dear Joe,
    I would love to say something profound and meaningful that would produce a “V-8″ moment and heal your heart, but the truth is, that s**t hurts. What a wonderful age we live in where a person can be deleted with a click of the mouse and no explanation. Don’t try to figure it out. I can ALMOST guarantee that it will have no or very little effect on Sprinkles and will ALMOST certainly continue to tear at your heart. In the words of Teddy Pendergrass…”If you don’t know me by now…” Her loss.

  3. Sorry, bud. This bites. I would agree with above comments, and just underline that its probably best you don’t send her the note in any form. Just walk away. Its one of those lopsided relationships where prolonged contact only continues to hurt you and reinforce Sprinkles’ overstated opinion of herself.
    Hope the online thing works out for you. I know a few happy couples that met that way.
    Love you!

  4. Thank you all for your encouragement.

    I did send the note last night. I thought a lot about it, and part of the reason I wrote this post was to get it out of my system without sending it to her, but in the end I still believe that underneath her selfishness and immaturity there is a good person there and I wanted her to know that this is not how you treat a person who cares for you.

    I know she won’t “get it” now, in fact I can tell from MySpace that she “read” it, and as I predicted there has been no response. She did work today and I am happy to report that we were polite to each other.

    She may not get it while I am in her life, but on the chance – even if remote – that someday it may sink in, I felt that I owed it to her.

    Like I said earlier, we were polite to each other today. She didn’t ignore me and we basically just exchanged hellos as we passed each other. At this point that’s all I expect. In writing this to her and putting it out there I feel like I took ownership of the fact that I made a mistake in caring for her more than I should have, but also that I took control of the situation and said “I’m not going to play junior high games with you. If you want to be my friend again, I’m up for that. The ball’s in your court.”

    Today was a great day too; I felt positive and actually had a good time. So I feel like I can finally put all this shit behind me and move the hell on.

  5. I will only comment on this one more time just because I liked what AptOne said… Prolonged contact with Sprinkles only hurts you and reinfroces Sprinkles opionion of herself. Joe, Its Ok to walk away now! Please Protect yourself and your ever giving understandinig heart. I don’t like when she hurts you and gives it no regard.

    Always, MGB

    • Understood, and I agree with you. I do have to work with her though, our departments are next to each other so I can’t completely walk away until I move back to CA.
      Believe it or not, I feel like sending the note was my way of walking away. My intention was to politely call her on her games and let her know that I’m out.
      Again, I thank you, BEG, and AptOne for your encouragement. It means so much to me!

    • MGB, I think you misread my reply to you. I meant to say that I thank YOU, and BEG, and AptOne for your encouragement.
      Please forgive me for not being more clear, I love you and you couldn’t be off my radar if you tried.
      You’re stuck with me.


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