This is the third version of this that I’ve posted (the other two were on Facebook). I reserve the right to continue until I a) get it right, or b) it implodes due to the immense weight of its own ridiculousness:
Many people know that C.S. Lewis, J.R.R. Tolkein, Charles Williams, and many other literary lights met every Tuesday night at The Eagle and Child pub in Oxford, England and they were collectively known as ‘The Inklings.’
What most people don’t know is that ‘The Inklings’ were also a rock and roll band and went around England solving crime and battling evil using their superpowers.
J.R.R. Tolkein played lead guitar and sang vocals. He also had the ability to bend space and time through the prolonged pronunciation of his complete name. In fact, since his reported death in 1973 many residents of Bournemouth, England have reported sightings of JRRT and rumors abound that he used his time bending skills to somehow prolong his life.
C.S. Lewis played rhythm guitar and sang vocals. He did not have superpowers in a technical sense, but was uncannily adept at the use of medieval weapons such as the sword and crossbow.
Charles Williams was the drummer for most of the band’s run. He was a last minute substitution after their original drummer Amanda McKittrick Ros was let go. Williams was a capable drummer, but was the most conflicted member of the group. His powers consisted of an ability to turn the dark arts and occult practices against the band’s opponents.
‘The Inklings’ had a long succession of bass players throughout their history including H.V.D Dyson, Nevill Coghill, J.A.W. Bennett, Dr. Robert Emlyn Humphrey, U.Q. Havard, Lord Edward Christian David Gascoyne-Cecil, and Roger Green, all of whom died mysteriously during the band’s performances.
After Lewis married Joy Gresham, she encouraged him to push the band into more experimental directions. This caused a rift among the members that led to the breakup of the band and a marked increase in British evil.