No, it’s not what you think. I’ve got cheating on my mind for two reasons: First of all, one of my good friends said on Facebook today that she was propositioned by a married man. She knows both he and his wife, and this has her quite upset. She’s wondering what it is about her that would make a man think that she would be receptive to this.
The other thing that happened is today I found out that one of the guys I work with is cheating on his wife. This is a guy I liked and respected. Out of all of the guys in the warehouse he’s the last guy that I would have expected this from, but he’s just as happy as a horny little clam. He’s calling and texting his “girlfriend” every chance he gets and was telling the other guys that his wife and his girlfriend are going to be at the same place tonight because she’s the mother of one of the boys he coaches.
No more than a month ago, this guy was in my car talking about his kids. We were making a McDonalds run (I like to get Happy Meals so I can send the toys to Boodles) and he was telling me how proud he was that his son had made a commitment to Christ at his church. Now this….
I’m not naive. I know what goes on, but this still really upsets me. I’ve been debating whether to talk to him or not. Part of me wants to pull him aside and say, “What the hell, man? What kind of example are you setting for your kids?” I haven’t said anything to him though because I’m not a very confrontational person, it probably wouldn’t do any good, and also I’m — what’s the word? Chicken.
I do have a theory. People cheat, and especially men cheat, because it’s part of our wiring, our DNA, the Christian tradition would call it our “sin nature.” I can’t speak for women, having never been one that I know of, but for men who want to be faithful it’s something that we have to guard against every day.
Once when I was the lone male at a table full of women, I told them my theory. All men are dogs. It’s in our nature to seek it out and stick it in anyone who’s available. Now some of us try to fight it. We go to ‘Dog’s Anonymous’ meetings:
“My name is Joe, and I’m a dog.”
The group all replies, “Bow wow wow yippee yo yippee yay.”
“I have been non canine for seven years.”
And it goes like that. When I was married I was faithful. Did I look? Yes. Did I think about it? Yes. Did I even want to at times? Yes. Did I act on it? No.
Does this make me a paragon of virtue? Hell no. But I did find the strength within me, and with God’s help, to fight the dog in me. I guess a lot of guys don’t, or don’t want to.
Do I have a snappy profound ending to this post? No.